


Inside Your Mind

by WhenIFindLoveAgain



Category: Fruits Basket, Fruits Basket (Anime 2001), Fruits Basket (Anime 2019), Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki (Manga)
Genre: Based on a The 1975 Song, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Falling In Love, Festivals, Fireworks, First Kiss, Japan, Japanese, Japanese Character(s), Japanese Culture, Japanese Mythology & Folklore, Kissing, Late at Night, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, No Angst, No Sex, No Smut, Shinto, Title from a The 1975 Song, True Love, Winter, Winter Solstice, Yuletide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:55:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26382964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhenIFindLoveAgain/pseuds/WhenIFindLoveAgain
Summary: Hatsuharu finds Yuki at a Shinto Shrine during the Winter Solstice celebrations when he's just wandering around, getting out of the house. Hatsuharu walks with Yuki, spending time with him, and, all the time wonders what is inside Yuki's mind. Based on song "Inside Your Mind" by The 1975 from their 2018 album "A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships".
Relationships: Sohma Hatsuharu/Sohma Yuki
Kudos: 8





	Inside Your Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Anyone who reads my work should know that I have three Gods; Dduwies Arianrhod, The 1975, and, Lorde (the kiwi singer, not the bible one) *laughing* so, of course, they have a lot of influence on my work because I listen to their music all the time as I write. I actually had a empty document called Inside Your Mind, I wasn't sure what I could write in it to go with the title, and, after a month or too, da-da! Yesterday, I came up with this. I hope you like it xxx

Hatsuharu was looking across the hall of the Shinto Shrine to Yuki where he was sitting patiently and quietly, much by himself. A girl sat beside him, and, she had a bit of a soft smile on her face, but, Hatsuharu felt a sort of empathy on the world in how she didn't carry on flirting with Yuki or teasing him like nearly every other girl in their high school did apart from Tohru Honda, Saki Hanajima, and Arisa Uotani. Good, Hatsuharu thought. Please sit beside him so no one else does

It was the 21st of December, Yuletide time. At this time of year, every year, there was a fireworks display from the Shinto temples as apart of the Winter Solstice celebrations, and, depending on permission from the council and when the pryotechnics could safely be launched, the dates varied a little bit each year. They were gathered in one of the main Shinto temples, purely as to not freeze to death whilst others in their thousands and thousands stayed outside to be amongst the winter fayre stalls, the ice-skating rinks, the late-opened restaurants and cafe's that's patrons spilled out onto the footpaths, the distinct promise of snow, even though they were going to be launching rockets, apparently.

Hatsuharu had been watching Yuki walk; he had been learning the new forms of ways that Yuki talked. Mannerisms of his that had changed as he had grew older; the same ghost-like qualities that could be correctly asscioated with him. Memories of sadness, lonliness, abuse, grief, trauma and pain, carefully, carefully put away behind a form of glass. Hatsuharu still saw it as clear as day in Yuki sometimes; a sharp movement of his body at a sudden horrible memory, the way he would suddenly appear tight or angry for a nanosecond before turning lethagic, the way he'd just leave the room for a couple of minutes or moments, checking on or getting something. 

The back of Yuki's head was at the front of Hatsuharu's mind.

And soon Hatsuharu wouldn't be able to stop himself from cracking it open to see what was inside.

Yuki's mind.

Insidey your mind, a voice whispered in the back of Hatsuharu's head, directed to Yuki across the room.

Hatsuharu made his way across the crowd over to where Yuki was, and, took a seat on the opposite side of him.

"Yuki." Hatsuharu whispered. Yuki was lost in his own little world, gazing out ethereally and sightlessly over the temple and how it was filled with people. Hatsuharu hoped Yuki was in a nice place, not somewhere in dark, not somewhere in the past. Hatsuharu purposely delayed bringing Yuki around, just to be able to gaze at him. It was a mark of inapprioate conduct, but, Yuki had always been beautiful. There was no denying it. And, in the winter, and, more pointedly, winter nights, such as now, he looked even more beautiful. His Scandinavian like pigment-less hair, his pale skin, his equally pigmentless eyes; so many people thought it was Albinoism, and, as such, were astonished when they found he didn't carry the characteristic traits of minor autism or unhealthy eye-sight. To Hatsuharu, he was perfect, all high cheekbones and curved monolidded eyes and his mouth, something Hatsuharu had always been a bit interested in. He was wearing a grey-toned wool jacket with a black turtle-neck jumper and dark coloured trousers. Hatsuharu didn't quite want peel Yuki's clothes from his limbs, but, he wanted to see them in a different setting. Other than that Shinto temple.

"Yuki." Hatsuharu whispered again. This time, Yuki come around. His head twisted quickly to the side, a simple expression of developing tiredness but kept awake by thoughts on his face. Hatsuharu wanted to touch him. Yuki's mouth momentarily became a very small smile.

"I'll let you go if you're mates are coming, sweetheart." The girl on Yuki's other side said. She was pretty and foreign. Hatsuharu wasn't quite sure what descent she was; he listened to her voice, and, she wasn't American, he determind that. Somewhere else then that had pale-skinned, oval-faced, white-skinned girls with dark eyes that looked very good with dark red lipstick. A kindly nature radiated from her being. "Make up some room for them. Thanks for looking after my bag."

Curiously, Hatsuharu didn't feel one bit of jealous or was removed to be uncomfortable from when the girl bent down slightly to kiss Yuki's cheek before walking away, waving her fingers gently over one shoulder. A warm colour filled Yuki's cheeks, and, there was a glow underlying in his eyes. Hatsuharu smiled slowly.

"She was a very nice young woman." Hatsuharu put an emphasis on very. Yuki ducked his head momentarily.

"Yes." He admitted softly. "She asked me if I could make sure no one stole her handbag while she asked one of the shrine maidens something; she came back and asked if I had anyone turning up with me, because, if so, she'd sit somewhere else." He gave a little smile. "She was nice."

"Where's the others?" Hatsuharu asked.

"I can come out by myself." Yuki answered, his eyes averting away from Yuki.

Hatsuharu thought that maybe he'd wait until Yuki was fast asleep, dreaming things that Hatsuharu had the right to see.

Maybe you're dreaming that you are in love with me, a longing voice in the back of Hatsuharu's head echoed, concerning Yuki; it was a hope, a pray, something needed, something wanted. For Yuki to be in love with him...God would have really outdone himself to have come up with that.

"The only option left is to look and see..." Hatsuharu accidentally spoke his thoughts aloud, and, Yuki looked back to him.

"Look and see what?" He asked.

Hatsuharu was quietly, quietly amazed to see that Yuki let him slip his hand into his, taking him out of the temple, back through the arching entrance doors, through the Shrine gardens, and out into the streets. For an hour, Hatsuharu and Yuki walked around together, talking sometimes but then not talking very much at all; they both equally had nothing of content to discuss with one another, apart from one question from Hatsuharu:

"Have you got that garden of yours under control after all this time?" 

Yuki had laughed. Hatsuharu had smiled at that laugh. It felt good. It felt like a matter of something successful. It was good.

"Jonquils." He answered. "I've got heaps of Jonquils growing out of nowhere."

"Don't they usually come up in the Spring?" Hatsuharu asked aloud, thinking he correctly remembered the little flowers, like small white versions of the Welsh daffodils. 

"Yes, I know, that's what they are supposed to do but we had a few sunny days and they decided to bloom."

Hatsuharu chuckled. Yuki smiled.

Half in his own thoughts, Hatsuharu's hand came away from inside his right pocket, thinking of Yuki's hand, and, incredibly, Yuki's hand from his side, moving gently as they had walked along, intwined with Hatsuharu's.

The only option left is look and see inside your mind, was decided in Hatsuharu's mind as he turned, his hands loosely curving up the sides of Yuki's neck as in one movement they both turned on their heels, and, Hatsuharu pressed Yuki up against a wall in a old, narrow, cobblestoned street of the city, Hatsuharu's mouth pressing up to Yuki's.

Yuki moaned so gently, so fleetingly, that, Hatsuharu though it had just been inside his mind, but, the backs of Yuki's fingers on one hand touched Hatsuharu's cheekbones as Hatsuharu pulled away from him, only a few centimeters, their lips burning electrically and full of blood from contact, the air warm and intent and dizzying between the two of them.

I've controlled you in photographs, Hatsuharu thought to himself, remembering all the times he had seen Yuki at school or out in the city or in a random photo that he saw via Tohru or Shigure, looking happy in a gentle, content form of manner, but happy nonetheless, and getting on with life. Nonetheless, Hatsuharu had had dreams where there was blood on Yuki, killed by Akito or having killed himself due to Akito; they were so painful, so raw, that that alone was grievous enough to send Hatsuharu black.

But, then, there were all those dreams when Yuki was married to them, they were in love...

They were happy.

Together.

Inside your mind, Hatsuharu thought of Yuki, kissing him again.

In the background of city, the fireworks went off as Yuki's teeth gently scraped over Hatsuharu's lips as they shifted slightly, Hatsuharu gathering Yuki closer, tighter against his body, up into his arms. The fireworks were like a metaphysical enchantment, a continuing progress of the time that both Hatsuharu and Yuki shared. It could almost be inclined to a comedy, just almost, on the immaculate timing of the Shinto Kami's and the Tokyo City Council.

"I love you." Yuki whispered against Hatsuharu's lips, the two of them sheltered away from the rest of the world by the dark sky. "Thank you..."

**Author's Note:**

> Have you ever been so in love with someone and what they are thinking that you've wanted to crack their head open to see just what is inside?


End file.
